Behaviours that reveal everything about class - Part 2
This is a continuation of ‘excerpts’ taken from the article written by Adam Skelton, (part 1), of which I wrote about last week, where a stewardess described how she learnt to differentiate between passengers who had real class and those who just had no class. Interestingly, what she says can well apply to the behaviour of people in restaurants too, as exemplified by the behavour of certain people who dine at restaurants.
Here are some more excerpts of her characterisations in that article: -
1. “They respect boundaries and space: This might sound basic, but you'd be amazed how many people think buying a plane ticket entitles them to everyone else's personal space. The classy passengers? They keep their music at a reasonable volume. They don't sprawl across three seats. They ask before reclining during meal service. They understand that we're all stuck in this metal tube together, so we might as well make it bearable for everyone. Meanwhile, I've watched grown adults put their bare feet on armrests, clip their nails mid-flight (I wish I was joking), and have speakerphone conversations in the middle of the cabin.”
The din of conversations in restaurants sounds different than the past. The cacophony of noise includes Ding. Bzzzt. Bap. Beep these days. What annoys the most are those inconsiderate jerks having a very public, loud, and personal phone conversation on their Bluetooth earbuds (or mobile phone). Well-behaved people practice proper phone etiquette in a restaurant. When they receive a call while dining, which they need to take, they will excuse themselves and go outside before answering (and then keep the conversation as brief as possible). There was this time where we were enjoying our meals, when a solo diner gets seated directly next to us in an empty table. He immediately pulls out his cell phone, props it up on the table and starts watching TikTok videos at full blast volume. Urgh…Talk of class?
"I'm so sorry; let me help clean that up." "My mistake, thanks for letting me know." Simple, direct, taking responsibility…Others? They make excuses, blame the crew, or pretend it didn't happen. I had a passenger once spill red wine on another traveler's laptop bag and insist it was because we hit turbulence. We were still at the gate.”
Diners with class often thank servers for every small action. It could be for filling water glasses, bringing extra napkins, clearing a plate. Each interaction includes a “please” or “thank you”. It maybe sometimes excessive…nevertheless staffs appreciate it. Unlike some classless wealthy, which treat staff like they’re invisible, speaking only to complain or make demands. I once happened to see a woman knock over her wine glass, and before the server could react, she and her husband were already mopping up with their napkins, apologizing profusely. Servers don’t expect customers to clean. However, the effort is touching. It shows awareness that someone has to deal with the mess and that the customer doesn’t see that person. In contrast, diners with no class will often sit back and wait for staff to handle it, sometimes without even acknowledging or apologizing for the mess.
3. “They don't mistake service for servitude: There's a crucial difference between providing service and being a servant. People with real class understand this distinction. They make requests, not demands. They say "when you have a moment" instead of "now." They understand that flight attendants are there primarily for safety, not to be personal assistants. The ones without class? They think purchasing a ticket means they've hired personal staff. They get angry when we can't break company policy just for them. They confuse professional courtesy with subservience.”
Gone are the days, when ‘the guest is right’ credo was sacred. That may yet apply today – but only to people of class, who understand that restaurant servers are “at their service - but not their servant"One of the fundamental aspects of genuine service from time immemorial is that of mutual respect - from the one that was served to the one being of service. People with class see restaurant staff as doing a job, not as servants and engage in conversations, however brief. Unlike some classless wealthy and pampered, which treat staff like they’re invisible, speaking only to complain or make demands.
4. “They leave things better than they found them: Finally, here's something I've noticed consistently: people with genuine class leave their space tidy. They put their trash in the bag when we come through. They put their magazines back in the seat pocket. They wipe up their spills. Not because they have to, but because they consider the next person who'll sit there and the crew who'll clean the plane. The others leave disasters. Crumbs ground into seats, garbage stuffed everywhere, like they're marking their territory with trash. They act like cleaning up after themselves is beneath them.”
Class shapes our behavior in ways we rarely discuss. After countless casual conversations with servers, bartenders, and restaurant managers, I’ve discovered that people with class do actually make their jobs easier and more pleasant. One server mentioned that there are diners who stack their empty plates (with food scraps on top), gather cutlery together, and push everything to the edge of the table – saving servers having to make multiple trips. To Staff juggling multiple tables, it’s a gesture that makes a real difference. On the other hand, diners with no class, see this as beneath them. They leave their table in a total mess, including the napkin they not only wiped their mouth and hands but also to blow their nose…
Ilzaf Keefahs is a freelance writer who enjoys focusing on hospitality related matters that he is passionate about, and likes to share his views with hoteliers and customers alike. He delves into the heart of hospitality to figure out both customer service and consumer trends that impact the industry.
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