Emotional Intelligence: Lessons learnt in hospitality - Part 2
“Your mind is in your power. You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength”. – Marcus Aurelius
In part one of my article that appeared last week, I wrote of understanding yourself. Being self-aware is about having control over your own mind. Whilst we all can influence outside events more or less, everything comes down to your beliefs and opinion about what happens around you. By learning to master your thoughts, you will be in control of your actions and realize a power far greater than anything outside yourself.
Moving on
Empathy is being aware of others’ feelings and needs, as well as being able to see things from others’ perspectives. One area of management that not only includes conflict resolution between guest and staff is employees with employees. Conflict is usually based on how one perceives conflict and arises when parties misunderstand each other's true position.
One such incident was when I overheard two employees, (let’s call them Roy and Kumar), going at each other. The root cause of the heated argument was that Roy had not handed over the restaurant menus to some guests (businessmen) during lunch service quickly enough. Both were good servers. As per their colleagues, Kumar approached work with a sense of urgency, whilst Roy, was sometimes a bit ‘laid back’.
Digging deeper into the matter, it appeared that Roy had intentionally delayed handing the menus, maintaining that had he done so, it would have interrupted the business guests who were in an animated discussion. One cannot fault him. Roy had used his emotional intelligence to ‘Pause and listen’ Kumar on the other hand was a highly productive worker whose goal during busy times was “get the job done quickly”. Most often, he moved things along at a good pace and in the process missed opportunities to pick up on those emotional intelligence cues.
In earlier days, I took a side – which was the easy solution. Soon though, I realised that kind of approach only brokers an uneasy truce, leaving one person bitter and de-motivated. In this instance, both Roy and Kumar were good employees in their own styles.
Lesson Learned: Whenever I encounter a difference of opinion between two employees, I quickly try to recognise their different styles of work and then seek out what works best for all. My intervention where it mattered most, was to mediate by helping each other through the conflict. This meant encouraging each adversary to put themselves in the other’s shoes - before coming to a conclusion. In the process they learned of different behavioural styles from one another. As a manager, it also helped me empathise with divergent or opposing views as well - even as I climbed the leadership ladder.
An empathy example that builds loyalty: Let’s assume you have a craving for coffee every morning. There are two cafes you frequent regularly because they both have a pleasant setting and serve excellent coffee at nearly the same price. Now, as a regular, say the barista at one café, remembering your name, begins to greet you cheerfully whenever you enter; unlike the barista at your other favourite café who doesn’t - even after umpteen visits. Which cafe would you return to more often? No need to guess…it’s the one where the barista provides service with a real emotional connection.
The above is but a small example that reinforces the value of an emotional approach. The COVID-19 pandemic has reduced conditions to an all-time low…but it should not hinder the opportunity to translate empathy even when facial expressions are hidden behind a mask. In a paradoxical turn of events, the outbreak has challenged the way we demonstrate emotional intelligence while seemingly obstructing our abilities to convey them. But that need not be so.
To be continued
Ilzaf Keefahs is a freelance writer who enjoys focusing on hospitality related matters that he is passionate about, and likes to share his views with hoteliers and customers alike. He delves into the heart of hospitality to figure out both customer service and consumer trends that impact the industry.
|
|
|
|
